Georgia: Tornike Kipiani

For Christmas a few years ago, my wife bought me a bottle of "Le Male" perfume by Jean-Paul Gaultier. As you can imagine, it all kicked off pretty quickly from there...

"What's this?"
"It's just some perfume."
"French perfume?"
"Well....yes...I guess it's French..."
"My English scent not good enough for you then?"
*The kids glance at each other before quietly sneaking upstairs with their Lego
"What's wrong with smelling like a Frenchman?"
"You mean a French 'homme'?"
"What?!"
"Tell you what....let's see what's in these other ones...oh look Italian shirts......flamenco dance shoes.....ooh, a German board game!! You want me to play like a Ger-mon?"
"A German?"
"GER-MON!"
"...."

Tornike understands and he wrote an excellent song about it last year. A bit rocky and screamy without being all "Hard Rock Hallelujah". Some great backing vocals as they taunt him saying "I love you" in all the languages he is so upset about already. A nice black and white video. Subtle retro vibes with the casette tapes and guitar strumming with a floppy disk. Toy car mini and VW camper. Few songs keep my attention once the lights and glitter of Eurovision have gone but this has remained on my playlist all year.

Once I knew Tornike was coming back, Georgia was one of the entries I was most excited to hear. Would 2021's song be a worthy successor to "Take me as I am"?

I don't know where to start! Tornike looks like he's dead inside and I'm pretty sure that "You" killed him. If you gave a handful of monkeys a kids' Casio keyboard and 10 minutes to write a song they would have made something better than this. Someone took the dullest meody they could find, slowed it down a bit, sellotaped it to a yawn, pinned it on a picture of a sunset and submitted it as Georgia's Eurovision song.

For the worst Eurovision songs you can currently get odds of 300/1 for them to win the contest. Georgia is the only country you can get odds of 400/1 for them to win. 

I've tried to find one positive thing to say about this song and this is the best I could muster.....Tornike's beard is pretty well groomed.